Poor Trump

I'm the best at everything. If I was poor, I'd be the poorest person ever. Nobody would be poorer than me. I'd be in the Guinness Book of World Records. I wouldn't even have a car. And if I did I'd fix it myself in the driveway. But I wouldn't be able to afford gas for it anyway so I'd send my kid out with a hose to siphon it out of other cars. Oh my God. I'd be so great at it. I wouldn't even have a beautiful wife. I'd probably just marry my secretary. I'd have a garden in the yard and eat stuff out of it instead of buying it at the store. And I'd shoot squirrels and eat those. And my family would probably starve to death. Maybe not. Dead isn't poor. I'd get food stamps for them. Ugh! Food stamps. Now that's poor. Come on folks, that's really, really poor. And we wouldn't be black. We'd stay white all the time. That would be unbelievable. And get this. My kids would go to community college. Oh my God.  I'd be so great.